My husband asked me last week if I thought I am a better writer now than I was five years ago. In some ways, it's obvious to me that I am. I understand the business of publishing better and this makes it so that I see problems in my writing immediately, editorially or conceputally. I am more objective about my own writing than I once was. I let myself hit my head against the wall when necessary to get to the next place, instead of giving up for now and hoping to get back to the right answer later.

But in other ways, I wonder if I am better. I think that the very things that make me a better writer may also make me worse. I am more likely to cut and to tell myself that something isn't "marketable" than I was before. I have the editor sitting on my shoulder kibutzing almost constantly, instead of enjoying the process of writing so much that I didn't care what the product was. I think the patience is good, though.

And the problem is, every book you write is its own book. Did writing the other books you wrote make you better at this one you're working on now? I don't know. There is a kind of courage required in embarking on a new book that I don't know how to describe to non-writers. To believe that you can write this book, no matter how much success you had with that one--I think you just have to need to write the new book enough to get over it, for whatever reason.

It's a tricky thing with children, too, actually. A lot of the same good parenting skills will work on a lot of kids. But each child is different, too, and needs entirely different skills. But what if you don't have them? What if you can't see how to help a particular child? Somehow you have to get them. Invent them, mostly. And get it wrong a lot. And be willing to get it wrong.